Naruto: Crisis: Shinobi Fate


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Heat Sensory

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Kaigen Uzumaki

Posts : 33
Join date : 2015-11-23

Heat Sensory

Post by Kaigen Uzumaki on Sat Feb 06, 2016 7:02 pm

Name:  Heat Sensory
Rank: A
Requirements:
Type: Physical
Description:
Heat Sensory is a special ability gifted by an evil doctor, who held Kaigen and Kurokon Shikyo-Uzumaki as experimental slaves. Kaigen have plenty of individual special characteristics trained and learned ever since the ordeal with his captures. This was trained while inside of the prison. It's only accessible through blindness. Did you say blindness? As in my guy Kaigen's vision must be showered in complete darkness. The base of his visuals are just shapes from nearly invisible chakra threads to anything bigger. Any color that is sensed is usually defined by the type of heat in the perimeter. A Kunai is cold with no heat, but he can sense the heat around it shaping it into form in his head. Only thermal colors are sensible to Kaigen during this ability. He sense humans as shapes of one color including clothing, the ground one color, the sky another color. Anything humanoid or alive have the same color. He can sense temperature increase and fire chakra before created into an actual jutsu. It immediately eats D-Rank amount of chakra from Kaigen but it gives him a field of heat sensory for 8 post before it requires another dose of chakra. No cooldown just a once in a while upkeep. In summary: Kaigen would be granted the power to sense targets, techniques, and objects as shapes. Anything with a particular heat signature gets singled out as colors.


Weakness:
- Mental distortion can disable this ability.
- If not at full health this technique is locked. Any damage given will alert the brain and the characteristic will be deactivated/locked until proper healing is required.

Open to the public: No


Last edited by 16 on Fri Feb 12, 2016 11:29 pm; edited 5 times in total
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Uchiha Kagami

Posts : 137
Join date : 2016-01-12

Re: Heat Sensory

Post by Uchiha Kagami on Sun Feb 07, 2016 2:50 am

Ok, lets get to it~

1. We aren't allowing multi-stage Special Characteristics at this time - we already have in place several special characteristics that serve as an upgrade-tree (eg. Improved spiritual stamina - Insane spiritual stamina, etc) So you can create a lvl 2 heat sensory SC separately, that builds off the first if you'd like.

2. Is the ability always active? You state there is no chakra cost, but is there any other sort of upkeep/anything required to maintain this? If so, how long can it be maintained for?

3. the ability in general seems very powerful - overshadowing many clan KKGs and other abilities that currently exist. We can look into ways of balancing this, but we'll deal with the first 2 clarifications first.

Kaigen Uzumaki

Posts : 33
Join date : 2015-11-23

Re: Heat Sensory

Post by Kaigen Uzumaki on Sun Feb 07, 2016 3:04 am

Made a few edits.
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Uchiha Kagami

Posts : 137
Join date : 2016-01-12

Re: Heat Sensory

Post by Uchiha Kagami on Mon Feb 08, 2016 12:07 am

Cool, thanks for the edits, 16! But upon further discussion we think the ability is still too strong and too "deliberately" similar to powerful KKG/Limited abilities already in the system.

It combines elements of Sage Mode, Sharingan and Byakugan, into a single SC. Each one of those abilities take up a character's limited slot, and are mutually exclusive with one another.

Breaking it down further,

Heat Sensing:
Predict and better analyze his opponents structure, techniques, movements and tactics by watching their heat in their body.
---------------------------------------------------
Sharingan: The Sharingan can predict movement by seeing the slightest detail and flinch of a muscle.

Heat Sensing: He can sense heat inside of objects and feel even the slightest amounts of heat traces
---------------------------------------------------
Byakugan: Able to see through solid objects, and can use a degree of telescopic sight.
Sage Mode: Passive sensory which reaches up to 100m away from the user. This sensory is able to detect Chakra as well as relative amounts within the location detected.


So, while not being directly the same in all cases, the degree of similarity is too high, coupled with the fact that this single ability grants a version of all three of the previously mentioned limited abilities, makes this SC too strong, and too broad in scope, in this current iteration.

Honestly, I'm having a hard time coming up with a version of X-ray vision/heat vision/sense everything around you at all times that would be permissible as an SC without a very strict restriction in place, or plausible reason as to WHY this is possible.

And even then, it shouldn't allow the user to imitate the functions of more than one of these, admittedly very powerful limited abilities.

Feel free to PM me for more information about this, and of course feel free to edit it for re-approval as well.

I understand this hurts the flavour you're going for, but as it stands, it's too strong.

Kaigen Uzumaki

Posts : 33
Join date : 2015-11-23

Re: Heat Sensory

Post by Kaigen Uzumaki on Mon Feb 08, 2016 12:20 am

Uchiha Kagami wrote:Cool, thanks for the edits, 16! But upon further discussion we think the ability is still too strong and too "deliberately" similar to powerful KKG/Limited abilities already in the system.

It combines elements of Sage Mode, Sharingan and Byakugan, into a single SC. Each one of those abilities take up a character's limited slot, and are mutually exclusive with one another.

Breaking it down further,

Heat Sensing:
Predict and better analyze his opponents structure, techniques, movements and tactics by watching their heat in their body.
---------------------------------------------------
Sharingan: The Sharingan can predict movement by seeing the slightest detail and flinch of a muscle.

Heat Sensing: He can sense heat inside of objects and feel even the slightest amounts of heat traces
---------------------------------------------------
Byakugan: Able to see through solid objects, and can use a degree of telescopic sight.
Sage Mode: Passive sensory which reaches up to 100m away from the user. This sensory is able to detect Chakra as well as relative amounts within the location detected.


So, while not being directly the same in all cases, the degree of similarity is too high, coupled with the fact that this single ability grants a version of all three of the previously mentioned limited abilities, makes this SC too strong, and too broad in scope, in this current iteration.

Honestly, I'm having a hard time coming up with a version of X-ray vision/heat vision/sense everything around you at all times that would be permissible as an SC without a very strict restriction in place, or plausible reason as to WHY this is possible.

And even then, it shouldn't allow the user to imitate the functions of more than one of these, admittedly very powerful limited abilities.

Feel free to PM me for more information about this, and of course feel free to edit it for re-approval as well.

I understand this hurts the flavour you're going for, but as it stands, it's too strong.


Anything original will have some similarity to canon stuff, period. It will always have some sort of knock off flavor to something already on the show or someone else custom. I very much disagree with the verdict based off the fact that I'm now seen as trying to pull a fast one on the site; however, I did edit it on the fact that I did reviewed it and found it maybe a bit too powerful. Perhaps this version could be more simple. I'm a bit sensitive on getting my things checked ... but I am pretty much anything within reason.


Edited ~








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Uchiha Kagami

Posts : 137
Join date : 2016-01-12

Re: Heat Sensory

Post by Uchiha Kagami on Mon Feb 08, 2016 12:33 am

I don't want you to feel like you're being singled out, or treated unfairly - but objectively this ability does too much, is too strong, and is too similar to those listed previously.

If you were to have made a virtual carbon copy of even one of those abilities, that would be too much to allow. They exist for a reason, and are readily obtainable, but require you, the player to make a choice - to choose them over some other ability. If there are no slots available for them, then thats unfortunate, but they were limited for a reason.

Custom techniques that borrow heavily from cannon/existing sources are completely fine - it all comes down to execution. If you're making a C-Rank fire jutsu that is a massive fireball, that can be acceptable, depending on how you describe it, the hands seals, the way it acts, etc. It functionally can have the same stats as Great Fireball Jutsu, but can be flavoured in a way that makes it different enough.

That said, there is a meaningful difference between a jutsu and a passive ability which is essentially a custom Dojutsu.

If you wanted to have it approved as a clan/bloodline, that would be another story, and we could discuss the implications of that. But mechanically, this ability can stack with those mentioned limited abilities, and is an effect that is almost identical to them. If you copied an ability from a source that wasn't ALREADY approved into this forum's system, then sure, have at it!

But since they already exist, it wouldn't be fair to those who have gone after those abilities, to allow another to be made that circumvents those.

Kaigen Uzumaki

Posts : 33
Join date : 2015-11-23

Re: Heat Sensory

Post by Kaigen Uzumaki on Mon Feb 08, 2016 12:49 am

My character was experimented on and thus how these abilities are possible. But I have a feeling you're just not going to let me have this so ...
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Esha

Posts : 53
Join date : 2015-12-27

Re: Heat Sensory

Post by Esha on Tue Mar 08, 2016 12:03 am

This needs to be vision based please.

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